relax, don't do it
Of course when Frankie, who went to Hollywood , sang that song he meant "don't fuck right there on the dance floor, gang; wait until you can get a condom on so that you don't get AIDS."
When I sing it, it's for a couple of different reasons. One being when, yesterday, the big black hairy jumping spider re-appeared, this time in Fluffy's room. And he was just really on the go, trying to figure out what he wanted to do, or maybe how he got into that crazy room in the first place and, more importantly, how to get out of it.
That little guy has incredible eyesight, gang. You get anywhere in his many fields of vision and he just stops and looks right at you and raises his two front hairy legs that look like dangerous little lobster claws or something, and then, for instance, if he's on the back of the closet door and you're suddenly sort of face-to-face with him, you can actually see him thinking. And he's thinking about jumping right into your face. So that is when I start to sing as soothingly as possible, "Relax, don't do it, when you want to go to it; relax, don't do it..." but I leave out the part about having sex b/c no way in hell am I having any kind of sex with that guy, condom or no condom.
The other time I sing it is when I'm like, surfing the Internet for "easy" and "best" ways to kill one's self. (It's out there, gang. Anything you want, it's on the Internet.) But then what I also find are pleas from 13 year-olds who really, really, really want to die & they want advice about how to do it. And I've been there and I've tried that and it was a really long and arduous road back, so wouldn't it be better to try to stay on the side of the whole equation that gives some sort of relief to the world instead of just "getting the fuck out of it" b/c life "so fucking sucks?"
Relax, don't do it.
It's all about perspective, gang. Yes, I'm going to be alone again, probably starting tomorrow. And no, I don't want to be in all that emptiness that I know by heart. And no, I don't want a whole lot of other things that I have somehow manifested for myself anyhow. (I will not attempt to list them b/c that will only reinforce their hold on me.)
But I do have many writing deadlines staring me in the face, which is always a good thing. I know I will somehow manage to steer my focus to those, put my soul down in those words in some way, find a reason to live (and maybe even live on -- past the actual living part). Plus I have those wonderful cats... We'll get by.
And it's likely to be a toastier winter since the inspectors from the weatherization place are on their way here this very morning to begin the whole process of getting my ASTRONOMICAL utility bills down to a more realistic level.
So on we go, gang. The next chapter awaits... (it might even be the best one, you just never can tell.)
When I sing it, it's for a couple of different reasons. One being when, yesterday, the big black hairy jumping spider re-appeared, this time in Fluffy's room. And he was just really on the go, trying to figure out what he wanted to do, or maybe how he got into that crazy room in the first place and, more importantly, how to get out of it.
That little guy has incredible eyesight, gang. You get anywhere in his many fields of vision and he just stops and looks right at you and raises his two front hairy legs that look like dangerous little lobster claws or something, and then, for instance, if he's on the back of the closet door and you're suddenly sort of face-to-face with him, you can actually see him thinking. And he's thinking about jumping right into your face. So that is when I start to sing as soothingly as possible, "Relax, don't do it, when you want to go to it; relax, don't do it..." but I leave out the part about having sex b/c no way in hell am I having any kind of sex with that guy, condom or no condom.
The other time I sing it is when I'm like, surfing the Internet for "easy" and "best" ways to kill one's self. (It's out there, gang. Anything you want, it's on the Internet.) But then what I also find are pleas from 13 year-olds who really, really, really want to die & they want advice about how to do it. And I've been there and I've tried that and it was a really long and arduous road back, so wouldn't it be better to try to stay on the side of the whole equation that gives some sort of relief to the world instead of just "getting the fuck out of it" b/c life "so fucking sucks?"
Relax, don't do it.
It's all about perspective, gang. Yes, I'm going to be alone again, probably starting tomorrow. And no, I don't want to be in all that emptiness that I know by heart. And no, I don't want a whole lot of other things that I have somehow manifested for myself anyhow. (I will not attempt to list them b/c that will only reinforce their hold on me.)
But I do have many writing deadlines staring me in the face, which is always a good thing. I know I will somehow manage to steer my focus to those, put my soul down in those words in some way, find a reason to live (and maybe even live on -- past the actual living part). Plus I have those wonderful cats... We'll get by.
And it's likely to be a toastier winter since the inspectors from the weatherization place are on their way here this very morning to begin the whole process of getting my ASTRONOMICAL utility bills down to a more realistic level.
So on we go, gang. The next chapter awaits... (it might even be the best one, you just never can tell.)
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